I can spot them really easily. I’m talking about single dads. I guess it’s because I’ve been divorced for so long, I just have a sixth sense. Usually, single dads have a very lovable way about them. You can see a combination of stress, pride and of course love in how they interact with their kids. I don’t want to stereotype single dads, but I will just for this article.
Just as it is for a single mom, I think being a single father is hard. You have to learn a lot of stuff that you might not have done when you were married. Single moms have to learn the things they didn’t do as a married woman, too. Having a job and seeing the kids takes a lot of planning–everything from meals to kids’ activities to vacations, as well as flying by the seat of your pants when something changes.
In honor of Father’s Day, I’d like to celebrate single dads and thank them for all of their hard work and dedication to their children with:
18 Things I love About Single Dads.
1. Single dads actually GO INTO the pool and swim with their kids. I can’t speak for all moms, just myself. I was more of a sunbather.
2. Single dads actually play in the snow with their kids, too.
3. They usually say yes to a request to go get ice cream.
4. They play dolls, house and dress up. They also bake cookies.
5. McDonalds is a regularly visited restaurant.
6. They come to baseball games in a suit, probably having dashed out of the office to catch as much of the game as they can.
7. They volunteer to be a coach for their son or daughter’s team.
8. They can be a wonderful role model for their children.
9. They’re usually smiling (when I see them) and seem like they’re really enjoying being with their children.
10. Staying up late isn’t a big deal to a single dad.
11. They’re fun! (sorry, moms, you’re fun, too, but they’re REALLY fun)
12. They act silly, even in public places.
13. They tell funny jokes.
14. They can rattle off sports stats like no one else (which sporty kids love).
15. They’re constantly taking pics of their kids.
16. They buy the latest gadgets.
17. They’re more open to the opportunity of getting their kids a dog.
18. They have this look of pride on their face that clearly shows how much they love being a dad.
I know I’m generalizing. Not all single dads are alike. There might be single moms reading this and cringing because their ex doesn’t do any of the 18 things. In fact, he might not even be in his kids’ lives. If that’s the case, I’m sad for the children and I truly feel for the mom. I also truly feel for single dads whose ex-wives are not in the picture.
But, all my 18 things are things I’ve seen in some of the single dads I know.
I’d like to address one more thing. If there is a lot of hostility and resentment in your divorce, it might be hard to acknowledge how hard your ex-husband is working to be the best single dad he can be.
I’m recommending that this Father’s Day, try to put your own story with your ex on the back burner and wish him a Happy Father’s Day for the things he does for your kids.
What if he didn’t wish you a happy Mother’s Day? Who cares! Do it anyway. You’ll feel great and your kids will learn from it. What if you wish him a happy Father’s Day and he rolls his eyes and walks away? Who cares! That’s HIS issue. Again, you will feel like you did the right thing and your kids will learn from it.
In closing, I want to say that for me, being a mom is my most important role in life, and I think that there are countless other single moms who feel that way. But, there are also countless dads who feel the same way, and what I’m trying to say is that it shows. It really does.
Happy Father’s Day!
