Peak Season is here for singles on dating apps, and that’s great news.
During Peak Season, dating app activity feels like it’s on steroids through Valentine’s Day when online activity surges with those determined to change their relationship status.
With millions of singles listing “fall in love” on their resolutions list, being prepared with an open heart and a captivating and updated dating profile will help you stand out as you seek your perfect match.
From my 30+ years of experience coaching singles on finding love, I’ve compiled the Digital Matchmaker® Guide on how to find love during the busiest day of the year, complete with a list of Dos and Don’ts to help you on your quest.
First, let’s start with what I call pre-date preparation.
DO: Start by Taking a Personal Inventory of Your Love Life
Try this exercise to be prepared to attract a great love who could be your forever mate. Make a list of your past meaningful relationships. What patterns do you notice? Do they all have the same hair color, height, weight, and career? Write down what didn’t work out in the relationship. Were they abusive or toxic, or did they cheat? Did they have commitment issues?
Then, write down what attracted you to them and their best traits. Completing this exercise will reduce the chance of having a rinse-and-repeat relationship that ultimately could fail.
DON’T: List Unrealistic Expectations
If you remember the summer song that went viral, “Looking for a Man in Finance,” you’ll recall the perfect man needed to have a trust fund, be 6’5″ tall , and have blue eyes.
In this example, if you’re only seeking men in the top 1% in the U.S., you’ll probably find yourself alone. Statistica reports that the average height of men is 5’9″, but let’s break it down further.
Only 1.3% of men in the U.S. have inherited a trust fund, and only 1% of men in the U.S. are 6’4″ or taller, but you might find yourself a blue-eyed guy. Blue eyes are the second most popular eye color for men, just behind brown eyes.
RELATED: Digital Matchmaker’s Irresistible Dating App Profile Tips
DO: Make a List of the Traits You’re Looking For
A Bumble survey showed that 72% of singles are looking to find a long-term partner in 2025, and that’s great news.
Your list of the qualities you desire should include lifestyle, shared interests, relationship goals for the relationship short-term and long-term, and attitudes toward money, sex, and family. If you’re on the same page, you can start dating with the intent to attract a compatible mate.
RELATED: Digital Matchmaker’s Irresistible Dating App Profile Tips
Next, it’s time to work on your dating profile.
DO: Start with a Digital Facelift of your Dating App Profile
Consider last year’s profile passé. Fashion and hairstyles change, and so should your photos and bio.
Since you’re only as attractive as your least attractive photo, it’s time to change your primary photo, along with half a dozen others that are now last year’s news. I’ve always recommended wearing red for women, with research backing up that the color red gets more right swipes, matches, and dates. I like seeing guys in blue, such as a denim jacket. Avoid white and black, which might look good in person but not on your potential date’s mobile phone.
DON’T: Post Old or Blurry Photos
The trend of posting selfies and over-filtered near-perfect looks has expired.
It’s also time to ditch your old photos which may send the message that you’re not serious. It’s time to present your best authentic self. Post some holiday pictures looking your best, and then fill in the rest by enlisting a friend to snap some newer photos showing off your award-winning smile and some travel photos of recent vacations.
DO: Utilize the “Best Photo” or “Smart Photo” Features on Apps
Many dating apps, like Tinder and Bumble, let their algorithms do their digital magic by selecting the best photo for your primary profile shot.
This behind-the-scenes work analyzes data that shows which photos get the best engagement. Consider it a handy cheat sheet by toggling the feature in the app.
DON’T: Post Party Photos if You’re Seeking a Serious Relationship
If your profile includes several group photos of you holding drinks in your hands, it sends the message that you’re a party girl or guy and not in long-term relationship mode. Make sure your photos include mostly ones of yourself so your date doesn’t have to play guessing games about who will show up on a date.
DO: Use all of the Digital Real Estate
Complete your profile by filling in all of the prompts or icebreakers to make it easier to start a conversation by listing your favorite activities, and captioning your photos with the locale and date to show they’re recent.
Utilizing all the available characters gives your match a complete snapshot of you. A fully filled-out profile shows you’re serious about the process, and a half-naked profile guarantees an empty date card.
DON’T: Use Cliches or Be Vague
I frequently hear from men and women who complain that too many profiles look alike, and they’re right. Since I spend hours daily curating matches for dating coaching clients, I often roll my eyes and wonder if I’ve already viewed a profile.
Instead of including the overused terms such as “I love to travel and go on beach walks,” if you’re a hiker, be specific about the trails you enjoy, your favorite ski slope if you’re hitting the powder, or your dream vacation locale. Don’t be surprised if someone writes to you suggesting a hiking date or gives you travel tips from their European summer vacation.
DO: Utilize Keywords in Your Profile
Many singles look for specific keywords while searching for matches. According to Tinder’s Year in Swipe, trends list, popular keywords include pickleball, which has the fastest-growing bio mentions at 148%, and hot yoga and pilates, which rank high in their beauty and wellness trends.
I also recommend stating how often you’re physically active and mentioning hiking, skiing, and other activities you enjoy. Love music? Mention concerts and the last show you saw, and you might find yourself on a musical date.
DO: State Your Dating Intention
Tinder’s Year in Swipe also says, “Situationships are out, and Intentional dating is in.”
Go back to the personal inventory list, I asked you to create with the reasonable traits you desire. Remember to make sure your dating profile accurately reflects your desired goal.
By being bold and clear and by putting your specific goals (dating, casual dating, marriage, marriage and children) front and center, you’ll attract better matches.
DO: Verify Your Profile
If you’re the real deal, let your potential matches know. Having that verified checkmark on apps like Bumble, Hinge, and Tinder will help you and your matches feel safe.
Follow the prompts and take a selfie to get your photo verified by the dating app. Photo and profile verification shows potential matches that you’re authentic, not a bot or fake profile.
RELATED: Julie Spira on People – Expert Tips for Staying Safe Online
Now it’s time to match, chat, and meet. With that in mind, here are the next steps.
Do: Be Selective on Who to Swipe or Match With
Before you decide which way to swipe or check on a profile, dig deeper past the primary photo and age to ensure you have enough in common with a potential date. Then, reach out to your match.
DON’T: Swipe Right on Every Profile
Continuously Swiping Right on every profile will guarantee you’ll suffer from dating app burnout and swipe fatigue.
Sure, it’s a numbers game, but think quality instead of quantity to receive better matches. Apps like Hinge and The League limit the number of daily matches to help you better focus on the matches they’ve curated for you.
DO: Date Singles Who Aren’t Your Type
Let’s review your original personal inventory exercise again.
Look back at all of your past and failed relationships. Do you notice a pattern? If so, you’re not alone. As a certified dating coach and online dating expert, I encourage my clients to date out of their comfort zone, and the results have been dramatic. Many engagements, marriages, and committed relationships fall into this category. Stop swiping right or left solely based on looks. Try it, and you might be pleasantly surprised.
Do take a two to three-week break if you suffer from swipe fatigue, but don’t wait too long, or your dream date might slip away.
Finally, it’s time to write and respond to messages.
DO: Turn on Push Notifications and Respond to Messages Promptly
I always say, “The squeaky wheel gets the digital love deal.”
Receiving instant push notifications of messages, likes, compliments, and any activity while someone’s viewing your profile will result in conversations that lead to dates. If you reply promptly while your match is fixated on their mobile phone, you might end up with a date as soon as that night.
DON’T: Don’t Play Hard to Get or the Waiting Game
I’ve lost count of the number of singles who decided to wait over four hours to up to three days to respond to someone’s message. Then their dreaded reply tells you they’ve met someone they clicked with, have decided to be exclusive, and wish you well on your search. Or, you’ll find yourself ghosted, unmatched, or will notice they took down their profile.
Ouch, that really stings, so please toss out those old rules and be an active participant in your dating life.
DO: Plan to Meet in Person or on Video Chat Within a Few Days to a Week
When it comes to meeting someone you’ve been chatting with, I strongly suggest meeting while the iron is hot—the sooner, the better.
Try to be spontaneous while remaining safe (no meetings at someone’s home or late at night).
DON’T: Turn into a Digital PenPal, or You’ll End Up in the Friend Zone
Endless texts can start to fizzle if you’re not meeting in person. While getting daily morning texts is fun, it’s frustrating when your match doesn’t suggest scheduling a date. When this happens, either they aren’t relationship-ready, or they’re playing the field, and you can find yourself in rotation.
Sure, it’s a good idea to date multiple people (three) at a time until someone rises to the top, but life is short, and being friend-zoned isn’t fun. If they can’t find the time for you to plan a date, and they just aren’t excited to meet you, it’s time to move on.
RELATED: 3 Ways to Know if You’re on a Date, or In the Friend Zone
DO: Use the App’s Safety Features
You might notice a pop-up message on Match with their “Are You Sure ” feature as you’re crafting the perfect message. This feature lets you take a second look at your message to ensure you’re not sending a potentially sensitive message.
Other safety tips include meeting in a public space, withholding personal information until you get to know someone better, and letting a friend know where you’re going.
At the end of the digital day, enjoy Dating Sunday and the new year filled with possibilities. With new singles joining dating apps every day, someone is and hoping to meet someone just like you.
If you need help to put your best digital foot forward, I’d love to work with you. Contact me about our personalized Digital Matchmaker VIP Coaching programs to help you find and keep your perfect mate.
Julie Spira is the Digital Matchmaker® and America’s Top Online Dating Expert. She’s an award-winning certified dating coach who’s been helping singles find their perfect match for over three decades. Follow @JulieSpira on IG and @digitalmatchmaker on TikTok.
