Many people going through divorce tell me they wish they had an “amicable” divorce. They automatically assume they do not because of negative feelings about the other party or the complexity of their assets. THEY ARE WRONG. What does amicable divorce mean? It doesn’t mean what most people think it means.
Let’s start with the definition of the word “amicable.” Amicable means having a spirit of friendliness. But that is not what amicable means in the context of an amicable divorce. An amicable divorce doesn’t mean the couple is going to be best friends and forget about the past, and all the resentment, anger and other negative feelings that are typical of people who get divorced.
An Amicable Divorce is the resolution focus of the professionals handling the process and the streamlined forward-focused out of court process.
When considering an amicable divorce, the divorcing couple does not need to have an agreement already, or have very simple issues or have a great relationship. I often tell clients the last thing they need to agree upon as a couple is how to get divorced. With an Amicable Divorce, the divorce professionals in the Amicable Divorce Network are the amicable ones.
The Amicable Divorce Network vets divorce industry professionals for being experienced, engaging in fair billing practices and having a resolution focus. Approved professionals then receive training on the web-based and out of court Amicable Divorce Process and corresponding technology platform.
Having professionals who all share the same goals of resolving differences for parties through a low conflict and efficient approach is what creates the amicable atmosphere. Professionals have the opportunity to receive advanced training on handling personality disorders, being an amicable advocate, addiction issues, special needs children, LGBTQIA+ families, high asset cases and more so they are equipped to deal with complex situations, and people, while keeping the case focused on the ultimate goal of an out of court resolution.
More on what amicable divorce means
The Amicable Divorce Process is entirely flexible and designed by the professionals in the case. Parties can choose to accelerate the case, or slow it down, as needed. The Amicable Divorce Team is also customized for the parties, for exactly the professionals they need and can afford.
The team may be comprised of attorneys, mental health professionals, financial professionals, coaches, real estate and mortgage professionals, wellness experts and professionals trained to assist with negotiated dispute resolution such as mediators, arbitrators and parent coordinators. All professionals are dedicated to helping lower the tensions and keep the process forward looking with a focus on the well-being of minor children when they are involved.
How is amicable divorce different from the collaborative divorce process?
With an Amicable Divorce, there are a few key differences with Collaborative Divorce. The first, is with an Amicable Divorce, none of the professionals compromise confidentiality with their client. Every professional maintains their same confidentiality with their client and does the same work they would in a traditional divorce. Because confidentiality is maintained, you can continue to use all of the professionals who have been working on your case if your case needs to enter the court system In Collaborative, you must start over with all new professionals.
Second, an Amicable Divorce is designed for the specific needs and finances of each family. Other than attorneys, no other professionals are automatically on the divorce team (and payroll). The professionals discuss what professionals are needed for THIS family and this allows the team to be more creative and completely customizable. Perhaps you have a special needs child and need an expert in that area, or need a Certified Divorce Lending Professional to assess the home mortgage, or just one party needs a divorce coach. The flexibility allows the professionals enlisted to be exactly what the family needs, and what they can afford.
Lastly, with Amicable Divorce, members to the Amicable Divorce Network are vetted prior to membership and receiving our training. This ensures that members have the correct mindset and attitude to assist parties and be resolution focused. With Collaborative Divorce, professionals take the training and are deemed to be collaborative. There is no vetting on their experience, billing practices or mindset.
What is the Platform?
The Amicable Divorce Technology Platform is a web-based system to which all Amicable Divorce Network members, and their clients, get free access. This program synchs bank statements, credit card statements, investment accounts and more to use the data to prepare budgets as well as continually updating Marital Balance Sheets.
The program allows the user to add other viewers of the information such as a mediator or opposing counsel. Having this sophisticated technology that updates required information cuts down on preparation time and cost to the parties but also produces reliable information as the financials are not being filter through either party or subject to human error in calculations.
Any couple, no matter how contentious they may be, is a candidate for an Amicable Divorce.
The reality is that over 93% of cases settle outside of court, yet most attorneys prepare a divorce case for a trial. This leads not just to heightened cost, but also adversarial emotions throughout the process. Parties are focusing on grievances of the past, instead of how to have a happy future. Parties are spending unnecessary funds on a contentious process not realizing the actions will not advance their case, and only (financially) benefit the professionals. By choosing Amicable Divorce, parties agree to have a future focus and desire a respectful, out of court divorce process.
If you are considering a divorce or are just starting the process, or even if you have been in divorce litigation or mediation for awhile, I encourage you to explore your options before proceeding any further. The process chosen, and the professionals involved, will guide the path of your family for the foreseeable future. All of the amicable divorce professionals are dedicated to making sure you have the best and most peaceful possible outcome in divorce. And who knows? Maybe you can even end up being amicable in the traditional sense.
If you’d like more information, or if you’d like a complimentary consultation, feel free to reach out to me.
Tracy Moore-Grant is a partner at the Georgia law firm of Patterson Moore Butler. She has practiced exclusively in the area of family law in the North Georgia area since 2002, and has focused her practice on all issues related to families including divorce, child custody, child support, domestic violence and contempt issues. Tracy Ann regularly handles matters which may be low conflict such as an uncontested divorce or complex family law matters such as cases involving psychological custody evaluations and small business and retirement division.
Tracy graduated law school from the University of Memphis, and has been practicing law since 2002. She is the founder of Amicable Divorce Network, an association of seasoned, licensed professionals who are dedicated to helping reasonable people navigate the process of divorce. All network members are vetted to ensure that they are leading experts in their areas of practice and have demonstrated a dedication to the Amicable Divorce Process. Network members provide expert advice and guidance while avoiding traditional, destructive litigation.
To learn more, visit the firm’s website, or her bio on Amicable Divorce Network.
