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“You can’t fall in love with me.”
Don’t believe everything you hear in adultery land.
That’s key.
They are just luvvvy duvvvy words to get you to drop your panties. No fairytales. No epic romance. He just wants to fuck. You’re a side chick. Nothing more.
He warned you, so he won’t feel an ounce of guilt when he pushes you away.
“I am not playing with your feelings at all.”
When someone says that, assume that they ARE playing with your feelings. Like A MILLION PERCENT.
C’mon.
No one can be this stupid.
They are using you for sex. Duh. On their terms.
You don’t like it? Move on. Or match his energy and don’t complain.
“I am done with this. You’re all about the drama.”
Oh, the “drama.” That’s what affairs are all about. DRAMA. It’s the classic rollercoaster. Up and down. Again and again. Lies and secrets and enough drama to fuel at least six episodes of Gossip Girl.
If he doesn’t care if you cum, no foreplay, and after sex there is nothing AND you hear any of the “lines” above.
Ta-da! YOU ARE OFFICIALLY BEING USED.
Maybe it’s a little gentler approach like below:
“You’re an amazing woman (man) who means a lot to me, but I can’t do this anymore. I’m sure you’ll find someone else to appreciate you more than I could.”
This is the epic shit sandwich.
“You are awesome, but I’m dumping you” speech. Most of us have heard some variation of this. Softening the blow just a bit with the platitudes to appease your scrap of ego hanging on by a hope and a hair.
The compliments are just for show, by the way.
Affairs are supposed to be fun and mutually beneficial. If not, why bother? You can find someone else or no one at all.
Don’t get used.
Being happy is all that matters.
—
Previously Published on Medium
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The post Are You Being Used? appeared first on The Good Men Project.
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