The Hardest Question I’ve Been Asked Since the Breakup

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Someone asked me a question the other day that caught me off guard.

“What did you like about your ex?”

And I sat there for a second, because I could’ve given the easy answers. The surface ones. The kind you say when you’re trying to sound healed.

But the truth is… everything about her felt real.

There was nothing forced about how we connected. Nothing performative. I didn’t feel like I had to be someone am not, or more put together. I could just be myself. Fully. Messy thoughts, bad jokes, half-formed ideas and all.

When I talked to her, it felt like I don’t have to think about anything. Like for a moment, all the noise in my life just faded into the background. Bills, stress, pressure, the constant feeling of needing to figure things out it all goes away when I was with her.

I couldn’t stop thinking about her. And I don’t mean in a dramatic, movie kind of way. I mean in the small moments. The normal ones.

I’d see something random and immediately think, “She’d like this.”

I’d hear a song and want to send it to her.

Something funny would happen and my first instinct was to tell her.

She was the person I wanted to share my life with as it was happening, not after the fact.

And that’s the part that gets me.

She felt like my best friend. And that happened so fast it almost scared me. I’ve never had that kind of connection with anyone before. Not where it felt so natural. So easy. Like we’d known each other longer than we actually had.

There was comfort there. Safety. The kind where you don’t feel like you’re auditioning for love. You just exist, and that’s enough.